Ryan Giggs

Ah, Giggsy. A Premiership footballer who has had a career for 21 years in UK football which I'm sure is some sort of a record. He started young and I do remember him when he was just 18 with a rug as thick and luxurious as a bear skin rug and a toned body to die for. Ah, it almost made me want to watch football.

Anyway, over the past two decades he has morphed from obscenely hairy scum hunk to obscenely hairy (but occassionally manscaped) scum daddy. I can't decide which I prefer but he definitely has more THROWDOWN as an older man. MMM-mm!

Simon Walton

A premier league footballer in England but better known to the gays as husband of ditzy, glamour model, celeb Big Brother contestant, Nicola T. (T standing for Tits presumably, hers are ridiculously large for such a sknny girl).

Anyhoo, Mr Walton showed up on Big Brother and immediately set off my throwdown-ometer. So hottt (three ts). He also showed up in Nicola T's place for a night of the Come Dine with Me WAG special and proved himself to be a lovely, shy and humble young man, the sort of man you could take home to your mum and be proud. Despite this trait I couldn't help imagining his cum face and all those locker room roasting sessions.

Phew, cold shower now.

Jay Harington

Jay is the star of new US sitcom Better of Ted. The show itself is strictly "meh" but Mr Harrington's awesome hotness is actually making me watch each episode. He's just so darn purty, like Clooney back in the day.
Unfortunately those damn Hollywood wax fanatics have stripped his chest bare. You just know that this guy is naturally hairy, I'm not talking Tom Selleck but he is bound to have a bit of a rug. But the only pics I could find his chest is as smooth as Chaz DeBono's. Which is disappointing, to say the least.

Josep Guardiola

He's the manager of the Barcelona Football team - I think.

Anyway, he's straight, has a couple of kids blah blah blah but how hot does he look, eh?

I wish football managers swapped shirts at the end too - well as long as Jose Mourinho's team and Barcelona played every week. 

I propose we start lobbying for this change in FIFA's rules. 

Oh and boo! to this guy - he has waxed his chest since that last pic (taken many years ago). Hate it when hot hairy guys go and wax it all off. I blame the chicks. They ruin everything.  

Tahar Rahim

This French- Arabic hottie is the star of new film Un Prophete - a hard as nails prison drama, depicting the rise to power of a mild mannered but directionless 19 year old in the gritty French underworld. There are a few scenes where he is shirtless and / or naked but goddammit! no screen grabs online yet!

In the film he does have that nasty, violent, chav look (which is, of course, very alluring) but out of character he is a deeply handsome man. He's tipped for big things in Hollywood (which probably means playing villains in a number of dumbass Hollywood action movies like every other French actor who 'made it big') and he definitely has that 'seed of nasty' which gives him massive throwdown.

Maybe its that turn in his eye which gives him the look but you just know he would be a very dirty boy in bed...

Tom Ford

The attraction here is only partly sexual... well, the majority of it is sexual I guess.

But also you gotta love this guy for his outstanding style, creative power and iconic standing in the fashion world. The man who singlehandedly put Gucci back on the fashion map and launched his own international label is now a film director with his debut move "A Single Man" about to launch in the UK. The film is hotly tipped to be an Oscar winner and even though I have only seen stills from the movie they honestly convey such a sense of style in every shot. And the film stars Julianne Moore, who is one of my Ultimate Fantasy Hags. I can't fucking wait.

Anyway, back to the hotness - he is smouldering, very overtly sexual and amazingly stylish. He doesn't shy away from making sex more than just implicit in his advertising and the entire stink of sweaty sex is all around him at all times! God, I gotta go take a cold shower...

OK so he's maybe had a little work done... I mean, the eyework is not altogether good and the forehead is a little too unwrinkled for a man of his age but like I say; his all over hottness overwhelms the merely physical.

And you gotta love the pics of his cute little ass in the shower with those two models.

Chris Diamantopolous

Ooh pretty!

First saw this hottie in the tame and boring Debra Messing (aka Grace from Will and Grace) vehicle The Starter Wife, where she played a scatter-brained, bitter singleton (ie Grace) and Chris Diamantopolous played her gay best friend (ie Will). Anyway, the show was a flop and so was this guy, floppy hair, simpering non-threatening castrato gay that he was in the show...

However, 24 Day Eight premiered in the Uk this week and woah, hold up! Who is this amazing piece of dirty hottness? It's Chris Diamantopulous... mmmmm. Somebody has been on the money diet! And got a personal trainer and a good haircut and looks really smoking hott.

He is the only thing which makes 24 watchable right now. Even though Starbuck's shoulders are wider than his he just about beats her in the Alpha Male category. Everytime he pops up on screen I am hypnotized by the hottness! If there isn't a sauna scene this series I will be very disappointed.

Anyway, he's married / dating / boning Amanda from Ugly Betty so he's not gay in real life... but he is married to the best Hag on telly which is close enough.